From the desk of King Selfish

As far as I'm concerned, the fact that John McCain is a weird little creep is enough to disqualify him from the Presidency. If you need a slightly more mature reason, check out this piece by a guy who voted for him in the 2000 Republican primary.

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Christopher Hitchens couldn't despise Jimmy Carter any more than I do, he just expresses himself a little better.

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Let are kids walk? Perfect.

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"If you spend word for word with me, I shall make your wit bankrupt". Shakespeare

Memory Lame

Vicar, the photo you posted brings back fond memories, although, to be honest I didn't recognize you at all. Bad lighting, no doubt. Most likely those who knew you then will best remember you as you appear at left. I think this photo was taken during a lunch break sometime in our freshman year of high school. All these years later I can still remember being amazed at how you would wait, ever so patiently, for someone to stop and feed you.

The good old days.

Well now that we got to see the younger and gayer version of the archduke, I thought everyone might be interested in seeing a pic I dug up of myself and the king. I forgot how much I resembled Harrison Ford when I was in Junior High and Mr. Selfish himself reminds me of someone but I just can't put my finger on it. It is amazing how little our looks have changed in 30 years. Memories sweet memories.......

The Vic

Semi-Anniversary

The Skeptics' Tank is now six months old. And they said it wouldn't last, pshaw! "They" should thank their lucky stars the magic trio is committed to blogging excellence, because the insights posited here over the last half year are sufficient to solve virtually every woe of mankind. So if this is your first time, slow down, look around, and come hate with us. You're welcome, World.

"I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly." Steven Wright

Shamnesty

I know that no one is shocked but I do not think we should grant amnesty to any illegal like we did before. I think we should round up all illegals and send em all home. To hell with em. Now that I have said that. People who hire illegals should be arrested too and all the people in charge of the government the last lets say 20 years? should be arrested too. If there was not a market, there would not be a problem. If there was nowhere to work they wouldn't come. We have created the market so the people come BUT they wouldn't come if our coward government would have or would stop them. They just whistle and look the other way and like I have said before this is old George's BIGGEST mistake. I mean even in mine and the King's old hometown the people voted to NOT allow illegals from renting and that town has a HUGE hispanic population so it seems obvious to me that not only the average euro american wants an end to the influx of illegals but so do the mexi americans and I am guessing the average afro american doesn't like it at all. We need a national referendum and I guarantee you the nation would vote to ship em back and shut the border down.

On another note check this out and watch May 22nd's Dateline http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12680788/

The king and I were in Ada at this time and we were in and around the action and some of the players. It was weird to see Karl Fontenot talk after not seeing him for 25 years.

That is all,

the Vic

slinking back

I was hoping to come roaring back, after my short hiatus, with a great post. Unfortunately that is not going to happen. Here of late I have been overwhelmed and underpowered when it comes to commenting on the things that piss me off. After five minutes of news I feel like a punch drunk, worn out boxer who can't recover from one blow before recieving the next one. Rest assured that this is a temporary situation. Like the Pheonix I will rise up, and once again, (probably after my nap) skewer my enemies with my rapier wit.

If your man-dress always smells like camel sweat and improperly wiped ass, then you might be a muslim.

If your skanky looking beard has globs of congealed mutton grease in it, then you might be a muslim.

If you singed off your eyebrows while setting your daughter on fire for kissing a boy, then you might be a muslim.

There now, I feel better already.

The Archduke

Bridge of Dearth

Where have all the posters gone? I know, who am I to say anything, but the comfort I found daily or so in reading the deep thoughts has been yanked away and I know not why? Come back.
me

With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy

I would like to play a new game:

"You might be a muslim....."

If you claim to be the religion of peace but blow anyone you disagree with up, then you might be a muslim.

If you teach young children to hate any other religion but your own, then you might be a muslim.

If you teach those same kiddos how to wield weapons and wear bombs on the name of allah, then you might be a muslim.

If you are willing to blow up a car with children in it in the name of allah, then you might be a muslim.

If you suppress all dissent of your religion with the threat of death or with real death, then you might be a muslim.

If you cover your women up from head to toe, enslave them, and treat them like dogs, then you might be a muslim.

If you wipe your ass with your left hand only and eat with your right hand only, then you might be a muslim.

If you are willing to commandeer a Jet plane and fly it into buildings to kill thousands of people in the name of the religion of peace, then you might be a muslim.

If you cheer for the commandeering of airplanes and the bombing of innocents ,then you might be a muslim.

If you are wiping your ass with stones and rocks with your left hand, then you might be a muslim.

If you blame zionist for all the world's troubles, then you might be a Muslim.

If you threaten to murder people for drawing pictures of the leader of your religion of peace, then you might be a muslim.

If you are a moderate and don't personally like the murder of innocents but refuse to decry the horrible actions of your fellow religion of peacers, then you might be a muslim.

Ok I am out of steam and I am not so creative in the first place so come on my brokeback wannabe friends, lets see what you can come up with!

That is all,
the Vic

King Selfish says...

For future reference, Mr. President, we do not wink at the Queen. Perhaps you didn't get the memo.

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If you choose to read the Bible, use the New King James Version. It beats the other translations all to hell. And since Ecclesiastes is the best book of all Holy Writ, I suggest you start there. Curiously, the Vicar is mentioned in the opening verse. Anyway, if you don't blow your brains out after having the futility of your pathetic little life shoved in your face, you may proceed to the kinder, gentler portions of the Word.

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"Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something." Pancho Villa's last words.

Let Us Prey

Click to Enlarge

What do you get when you mix radically left journalist, Alexander Cockburn (pronounced Coburn), with The Nation, arguably the most liberal magazine in America? Tick-tock, tick-tock...time's up. If your answer was, "An excellent article exposing the current global warming mania for the misguided neo-religion it is, with just the right amount of Catholic Church bashing thrown in", then you get a star on your cute little forehead.

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"It makes me mad when people say I turned and ran like a scared rabbit. Maybe it was like a mad rabbit, who was going to fight in another fight, away from the first fight." Jack Handey

Whew!

Boy, was I relieved to wake up this morning and find that the U.S of A. was still ginning right along. This is the second year in a row that the smelly,brown invaders have tried to bring us to our knees by not showing up for work. The only difference I noticed yesterday was the absence of two-legged cattle in reflective vests standing around in the road construction zones. Oh, and the girl who gave me my coffee at Mcdonalds spoke fluent English.

I noticed that Rage Against the Machine got back together and proclaimed that Bush should be "Tried, hung and shot." Is it just me or shouldn't the word convicted be in there somewhere? To me this shows the difference between the right and the left. We on the right will try you, CONVICT you(with facts and evidence), then hang you and shoot you. The left, on the other hand, omits the conviction part because they are too occupied with their feelings to bother with things like facts and evidence. I know I'm right about this because I feeeeel it so deeply.

Today's word is: OBSTREPEROUS- noisy and hard to manage.
When half a dozen or so mud people get together they usually become obstreperous.


Relievedly Yours,

The Archduke